Demographic Deficiencies Down-Under

There exists a dearth of men in Australia, not that most are homosexuals or have evolved into effeminates, but that the exodus of men between 24 and 34 years old, have depleted supply. Global warming may be bringing another damaging dimension, this time to the social weather of Australia. After losses caused by the drought, the men have sought better opportunities in other parts of the globe, leaving their country in male aridity or "man drought". There are about 100,000 females more than males Down Under, a paradise for men with Islamic orientations, but a woeful disadvantage for women with monogamous intentions.

The situation has become a game of musical chairs. Large numbers of Australian women have abandoned the countryside, moving to the cities for better job opportunities and lifestyles - leaving communities loaded with much younger males. The men have left the cities for jobs overseas. The gender imbalance in the countryside that's populated by many young men, and the concentration of many unattached women in the major cities, have compelled Australia's demographers to draw a "love map" to plot how the clusters of unattached men and women are distributed across the continent.

Australia is a big place, and even if the map could show these gender clusters, who should make the sacrifice of leaving their jobs and their lifestyles just to meet and mate? It sounds awfully primitive and predatory but that seems to be the concern of demographers because of the far reaching implications of a slump in the "happiness and gratification index", that would affect productivity and mental stability. Or, fears of a sharp rise in same sex relationships and marriages in the countryside and cities that would lead to a birth rate too low to sustain the current and future operations of the economy. No mention was made of adopting from Asian and African countries as an option, nor inter-racial marriage with the Aborigines.

A new approach was made by Mount Isa Mayor John Molony to draw women to his remote mining town which has an oversupply of men. He invited "beauty disadvantaged women" to Mount Isa where happiness awaits. He even stressed this description by citing the fairy tale "The Ugly Duckling" which turned into a beautiful swan - implying that getting a mate or the derivation of physical pleasure from such an arrangement will make any woman happy.

The invitation is ludicrous. It means that any woman who goes there admits to being ugly and desperate. And, any man who marries a visiting woman would have an ugly wife. Also, the presumption that a woman with a man would be assured of happiness only because she obtains a live instrument of manhood is a gross misunderstanding of what makes women happy. It looks at women as starved for sex; and men, as gifts from God, would satisfy this want by making them receptacles for their urges. But the mayor did say that beauty is only skin deep. However with the thickness of the mayor's skin in his declarations, it would perhaps take an eternity for the women to dig deep into that skin to find any semblance of beauty in the men's attitudes and values. If it exists at all.

Perhaps the absence of women has already affected their thinking patterns and reasoning abilities. No such pronouncements has been aired by women who seem to be going about their business enjoying freedom and independence in their careers and lifestyles. If the officials of Mount Isa are fearful of the transformation of their community into "Brokeback Isa", perhaps they could try kangaroos instead. They don't seem to have any preference for looks anyway.

Haaarrrrwwwwwwk...Twooooooph...Ting!