Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Fondness is a Felony


In South Africa, the government and its lawmakers believe that kissing a child 15 years old and below comes with a lascivious intention of committing rape. Between teen-agers of the same age bracket, it is tantamount to provoking lust, and all such expressions of fondness can land them in jail under the Sexual Offenses Act. So, if 90 year old grandparents kiss their 12 to 15 year old grandchildren on their birthdays, on Christmas, New Year, or greeting them after years of absence; these are felonies that are covered under acts of Consensual Sexual Violations.

Similarly, kissing between cousins or saying goodbyes at bus terminals or airports, are taboo. To be sure, ask the age of the child unless you want to be delayed with a criminal case in a country where rape of children is a common occurrence. Apparently, the government believes that teen agers of this age range are not responsible enough to hold hands with their girlfriends without raping or sexually abusing them.

A move to allow Children 16 years old and over to vote is being considered in the country. Such responsibility however, bars them from kissing their girlfriends who might be younger than they are. What will they do to implement this law? Have the police at all parties and haul to prison all those found kissing or expressing affection? Fondling too is an act of Consensual Sexual Violation, so even if both parties consent, its against the law. Movie houses, discos, car parks, recreation centers, playgrounds, gyms, school campuses, etc., are all of these places potential "kissing spots" where the government will install cameras to prevent intimacy? Will they hear "Hey you, you're under arrest for kissing!" on a PA system? How will they prove guilt, prevent the parties from swallowing until they can take a DNA sample of the saliva in each of the couple's mouth?

There is nothing more ridiculous than a law impossible to implement, or guilt you cannot prove, for an act that is not supposed to be a crime. Can you imagine young lovers facing each other in court? Does the law believe they will admit to touching each other or being touched by the other? According to insiders, the Law was created in an attempt to prevent all intimacy in the light of the high HIV transmission rates among the young. The lawmakers must be calling on their ancient tribal Gods in passing this legal gem because they cannot come up with anything more creative or constructive other than criminalizing children. Think about it, your child will have a criminal record for committing the crime of "kissing" - 5 years, "with tongue inside mouth of victim"- 6 years, total 10 years. This is absolutely insane!

Consider the intent, to prevent intimacy - are they serious? Were these lawmakers born old or fully grown up? They never experienced puberty and the raging hormones that go with it? When God was giving out brains, these lawmakers must have been in the toilet, and accidentally or deliberately flushed down God's gift.

There are some loud protests over this law from rights groups and non-government organizations. It seems that the South African Parliament has received a directive from its Head of State to amend the law. With their current mindset, they are probably voting on a measure, pending the agreement on the design and material to be used; to mandate the use of Chastity Belts for boys and girls aged 9 to 15. Heaven help the South African children!

Haaaarrrrwwwwk...Twooooooph...Ting!

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